The Zombie Farm

Zombie Farm Video

2011-11-06T07:37:00.000-08:00

Here's a little video I made for youtube.
Shows a little of what is for sale this holiday season.

New Zombie Key Chains and Christmas Ornaments

2011-11-05T08:01:00.000-07:00

zombie key chain PINKY
Link to Pinky

Tree ornament Dottie
Link to Dottie

Tree ornament zombie
Link to ornament zombie

Rocky
Link to Rocky

Bloody Mary
Link to Bloody Mary

A Zombie Farm Christmas

2011-11-04T16:09:00.000-07:00

The holiday season is drawing near! I know this to be true because I just saw some zombie dolls gnawing on Santas legs! They are so adorable when I take them to dig up Santa.

Sing with me: I'm dreaming of a zombie christmas, just like the ones that scare us so...

I have been busy listing dolls, buttons and keychains on etsy. Stop by and have a click around.

Zombie Elf tree ornament

Zombie Santa of Christmas Past

Fall into Halloween

2011-09-11T07:13:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year!!! Fall will be upon us shortly, Halloween is just around the corner. Mums are getting ready to be sold in stores, the pumpkin farm down the road is setting up their pumpkin displays and some stores have already put out Halloween items!

At the end of this month the Zombie dolls and I have a zombie walk !!! Today I'm going to buy some liquid latex and other make up supplies. I've watched some YouTube how-to videos and I'm ready to zombiefy myself, and stalker zombie Joe also.

Also today we begin to build Grim Reap. He is to be our yard protector and collector of souls. We bought the PVC last night !!! I'm so excited !!!

The zombie dolls are dancing in their little graves with anticipation !!!

Surviving another year

2011-08-26T09:38:00.000-07:00

Well another year without our Mattman has passed. 6 years ago we lost him.
It is still painful but now my memories of him brings more smiles instead of tears. Not always, there are still some days i scream and cry. I will never quit missing him or mourning him. But now i am able to cherish and celebrate the 8 years we did have him.

as always i can't stress enough, PLEASE GET YOUR CHILDS HEART CHECKED BEFORE STARTING ANY SPORT !!!

2011-07-04T07:16:00.000-07:00

http://www.etsy.com/listing/77156844/zombie-ms-dod

Little Ms. Day of the Dead, or Ms. DOD
Ms. DOD was just your average homemaker until….the zombie doll outbreak. Now she is a zombie homemaker. She’s just like your average homemaker except she only serves brains, at every meal and for snacks. Just beware she is a modern homemaker and will not wait on you hand and foot, now she may try to bite hand and foot but hey we all have our little quirks that others just don’t understand. When she’s not cleaning the crypt or disposing of bodies Ms. DOD is looking for someone to love her and give her a good home.

DOD started out as a back to basics black zombie, when she was done in her black only self, she looked at me and said, "Really? All black, nothing special?" I relied, "That's right all black but you are special."
She looked at me with her dead eyes, "I see there's a fresly dug hole in the Zombie Farm cemetery. I'm not afraid to bury the Zombie Queen or what's left of her."
I laughed, she grabbed up my scissors and started my way...so now she has some beads in her hair and a nice Day of the Dead apron. I have a few new scars...

Zombie Red Sonya doll by zombiequeensusan on Etsy

2011-07-04T06:06:00.000-07:00

Zombie Red Sonya,
she's cute
she's mean
she must
be seen!

Zombie Red Sonya doll by zombiequeensusan on Etsy

Zombie RED SONYA

2011-06-25T14:13:00.000-07:00

http://www.etsy.com/listing/76655452/zombie-red-sonya-doll

Straight from hell and for sale....

Zombie Farm Rag Dolls to swarm Kannapolis - ModernFilmFest

2011-06-25T11:35:00.000-07:00

An article by Michael Knox

Zombie Farm Rag Dolls to swarm Kannapolis - ModernFilmFest

Zombies Para and Site

2011-02-17T17:47:00.001-08:00

Para and Site

Too much evil for one head

2011-02-13T08:09:00.001-08:00

Yesterday I decided to experiment a little...TA DA !!! A two headed zombie!

I am very happy with how she came together, I expected more issues to crop up but all in all she went together with just a few mishaps.

She does have a few issues, like she bites twice as much as other zombies and she has some small problems you can't see in the pic.

My next two headed brain muncher will be a tad slimmer in the waist, she just looks too wide.

But the big question is...will anyone be willing to buy a two headed zombie?

Next question...what the heck to name her?

Size does matter !

2011-02-02T16:26:00.000-08:00

Some people are shocked when they receive their zombies...they are surprised at how big the zombie dolls are. Zombies are 22 inches in length...doesn't sound like a lot does it? You'll be surprised. Here is a pic of me, the zombiequeen with one of the zombies.

Zombie Doll VALLEY TYNE

2011-02-02T16:22:00.000-08:00

Freshly dead and searching for love!

Zombie doll VALLEY TYNE !

Spreading some VD!

2011-01-16T16:11:00.000-08:00

Here is a zombie made just for Valentines Day!

Poor Hannah…she is doomed to search for love forever. She finds love easily but her zombie cravings always get to her and she munches on her loves brain. That’s always a downer for any relationship!
But Hannah never loses her smile and she never loses hope. One day she will find that special someone who will help her overcome her brain eating addiction and they will decay happily ever after.

My zombie is back and you're gonna be in touble...

2011-01-08T06:33:00.000-08:00

Okay....it's been awhile. But with the world ending in 2012 I have but the blog on the backburner.

Here on the zombie farm we have moved the whole damn farm, thank you scam lawyers and greedy banks. The biggest thanks going to the idiots behind the bank bailout. WTF were you guys thinking? You give the banks money to cover all the loans thay have for our homes. So why than would the banks care about working with people and helping them save their homes? Answer, they dont care. We were not even in foreclosure and our house was sold. But ha ha to you bank...the house has so many repairs it needs and due to a recent discovery, a black mold infestation. You can now foot the bill for all that shit!

Thankfully the zombies, stalker zombie joe and I have found a nice rental house. I am in the crypt getting ready to sew some new zombie dolls!

A few zombies are in the works for VD (valentines day)!

Pics will be posted soon!

When Zombie Dolls Attack

2010-08-14T11:27:00.000-07:00

The line has been drawn in the graveyard dirt…which side are you own? More importantly, which side is your zombie doll on?

Zombie Corey is leading the war against humans. He has many recruits. He thinks his army will win the battle by numbers alone.

Zombie Morgy is fighting to save the humans. She has fewer recruits. She thinks her army will win the battle by the love in their unbeating hearts.

The war is coming.

Choose wisely.

Choose soon.

The day is coming for “When Zombie Dolls Attack”!

Look for the new zombie doll series "When Zombie Dolls Attack" to launch this fall!

New on the Zombie Farm

2010-07-18T17:38:00.001-07:00

Zombie Bride/Bride couple.

Trying my hand at glass pendants, it is really teaching me patience. Something I lack.

Witchy Web

2010-06-03T17:05:00.001-07:00

Here she is....custom zombie doll Witchy Web

UnHandy Mandy Contest

2010-05-31T12:42:00.000-07:00

The contest for zombie doll UnHandy Mandy begins June 1, 2010 and will run till the end of the month. June 30, 2010

How do you enter? You ask.

Easy...all you have to do is leave a comment...but not just any comment.

Tell me which famous person you'd like to see as a zombie doll!

You only need to comment once, multiple comments will not give you more chances.

Winner will be chosen by name in hat type drawing.

Winner will be announced July 5, 2010

I am new at this contest thing so be patient please.

Good luck and may all your zombie nightmares come true!

~Zombie Queen

Zombie Outbreak Infects Whole Family !!!

2010-05-23T12:56:00.000-07:00

Names have not been changed to protect the innocent!

Here's a story of a lovely mother

who invited her kids to an early lunch

On the way there, one was attacked

that's how they became the Zombie Bunch!

We have: Jamie the oldest.

Laura who is followed by Nicole

and the heart of the family, Mom

The Zombie Queen Story

2010-05-22T13:44:00.000-07:00

I have been asked by several people how I got started making Zombie Rag Dolls...

Here it is, pay attention, there maybe a pop quiz afterwards. :)

First doll I ever made was ghostie. My son Matthew had a fear of the dark and ghost. (the ghost thing was my fault, long story there) One night he just sat screaming in bed because he was afraid a ghost was going to come get him. I had no sewing machine then but I had an idea. I cut up a white sheet, drew a ghost shape and a lot of hand sewing later GHOSTIE was born. I told Matthew Ghostie would keep the bad ghost away. He grabbed Ghostie and slept with it from then on.

Sewing machine was bought months later. Curtains and pillows were made. Summer arrived and I begin to work on Halloween costumes.

Matthew passed away that August due to a heart condition. He was 8 years old. My heart was broken, my family was broken.

Rachel, my daughter who was 12 at the time. Asked me to make her and her friends dolls based on Sally from 'Nightmare Before Christmas' (my favorite movie of all time). I drew the pattern out and several dolls and happy girls later I was done with dolls forever.

After some family drama, rumors of witchcraft and voodoo (long funny story) I was sitting at home having a sobbing fit because I was missing my Mattman so much. I spotted Rachel's doll, my mind begin to race. Thoughts invaded my mind, a plan was forming, that ominous da da da da music begin playing. (where the hell did it come from?) I stood up and declared..."Eureka! I am the Zombie Queen and I will raise an army of Zombie dolls and take over the world!"

I began the journey of becoming the Zombie Queen. Many patterns were drawn and tried. Each one getting closer and closer to what I saw in my mind. I noticed when i spent time creating zombies for other people my heart was not so heavy. Yes I miss Matthew, more and more everyday. But the Zombie dolls were helping me keep what little was left of my mind.

So now the Zombie outbreak continues...

2010-05-20T18:16:00.000-07:00

Ms. Zombie Brooklyn

and Zombie Jamie

Coming out of the burial plot....

2010-05-19T19:51:00.000-07:00

Been working on several custom Zombies.
Finished 2 up today, hopefully 2 or 3 more tomorrow.
Am very excited about a set of 4 I'm working on. Custom for a mother and her 3 children.
Hopefully i can take some pics tomorrow.
Purchased some labels for the zombies and trying them out on this latest batch.
I'm also thinking of venturing into making glass pendants using pics of the zombie dolls. Still undecided.

Witch way to the past?

2010-05-11T15:50:00.001-07:00

Witch Zombies I have done in the past.

Zombie Bride and Groom

2010-05-11T15:42:00.001-07:00

Another custom order from the Zombie Farm...

For you Ms. Mia!

Fresh off the Zombie Farm

2010-05-02T18:29:00.000-07:00

Just finished her...now I need to name her before I can list her.

Zombie Dolls plotting an uprising

2010-05-02T12:13:00.000-07:00

So here I was on the Zombie Farm relaxing when I stumble upon a group of Zombie dolls. I grabbed my camera to snap a few shots. To my surprise I discovered I had crashed a meeting to plan a zombie doll uprising.....here is the evidence.

Custom Zombie for Pretty Screams

2010-05-01T12:05:00.000-07:00

Just finished another custom Zombie doll !

He was raised from the dead just in time to take zombie Hail to the ZOMBIE PROM !!!!!!

Sheepyhead Donation

2010-04-27T18:26:00.000-07:00

Sheepyhead is one of two zombies being donated to a special event!

Custom Zombie

2010-04-27T17:33:00.000-07:00

Here is a custom Zombie I just finished up! (only for you D, only for you)

Custom Zombie T

2010-04-13T18:12:00.000-07:00

This is custom Zombie for friend whose son is going into service and he plays the trumpet. So she asked me to incorporate both themes....here is ZOMBIE T !!!

New Zombie Dolls

2010-03-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

Just a few of the latest Zombies from the Zombie Farm

The Sisters Goth...their sweet smiles will mislead you. They are all evil.

Zombie Doreen Ducky...she just wants to find a loving family.

Zombie Outbreak in Christmas Land

2009-11-29T12:59:00.000-08:00

This holiday season the Zombie Farm presents: ZOMBIE OUTBREAK IN CHRISTMAS LAND

It was a typical evening in the North Pole. Toys were beig made in the tiny little elf sweat shop, reindeer were learning their flight patterns and picking on the reindeer academy rejects. Mr and Mrs Claus were in their cozy little cottage looking over the naughty and nice list. Naughty list is much longer this year by the way.

Mr Claus being the beer belly guy he is (bet you thought that belly was from cookies huh?) got the craving for a little draft beer. While Mrs. Claus was in the kitchen cooking up some cookies, he headed down to The Holly Jolly Candy Cane for some beer and little elf action. Upon arrival he was attacked by his cousin the dreaded Zombie Claus and the elves that had already succumbed to the zombie virus. With Santa out of the way, Zombie Claus and the elves made their way through all of Christmas land.

Elf Ms. L Toe and her hubby had just finished up their shift in the toy factory and were dressed for bed when they were attacked. Mrs. Claus has just taken a fresh batch of cookies out of the oven. When she saw the crazy eyed elf standing in her kitchen she just assumed he was there craving some cookies so she handed one. She lost her hand and was infected.

The reindeer who were training were attacked and infected. The reindeer academy rejects escaped and now roam the wilds of the North Pole safe from the infection that is spreading over the world leaving the undead to enjoy this holiday season.

HAPPY ZOMBIE DAYS!!!!!

Holiday Specials at The zombie Farm

2009-11-22T07:50:00.000-08:00

Just lowered prices on Zombies I have listed on Etsy right now. http://www.zombiequeensusan.etsy.com/

Will be in the cemetery raising more Zombie dolls all week. They will be listed on Etsy at their sale prices.

Many other Esty shops will be having sales this week and next...go to http://www.etsy.com/ and check them out!

HAPPY HORRORDAYS!

Zombie Doll D'Mourning from the Zombie Farm

2009-11-15T09:59:00.001-08:00

Zombie D'Mourning

Based on 'She Talks to Angels' by the Black Crowes. Which is an awesome group by the way.
I have loved this song since my teen days than after i lost my son it really touched me in a different way.

But here is D'Mourning and my take on the song.

To me the character in the song is a young woman who has lost someone she loves dearly. Though she is young she has begun to live her life like an elderly woman in mourning. Death is what she is living for. Death is what she craves, she is mourning herself to death. Death brings a smile to her because she knows that death will bring her to her departed loved one.

Look up the lyrics and listen to the song. It is just awesome.

Zombies for Christmas?

2009-11-14T17:47:00.000-08:00

Listed two new Zombie dolls on etsy today

One from the GoodNight SleepFright series...Zombie Sheepyhead (hubby came up with that name, i'm totally innocent this time)

and the Christmas zombie.....

Zombie Missy Toe

Zombie Doll Matt from the Good Night Sleep Fright series

2009-11-13T18:49:00.000-08:00

Zombie Matt in his camping flannel pajamas. He needs a good home...can you give him a good home? What about his Zombuddies?

http://www.zombiequuensusan.etsy.com

Zombie Doll Susy Skellton

2009-11-07T16:22:00.000-08:00

New to the Zombie Farm...ZOMBIE SUSY SKELLTON

Susy is fresh from her grave, new to the world of the flesh craving walking dead.

Here on the farm she has already caused some trouble. She let the Zombie goats loose. They took off and tried to eat the neighbors...again.

So don't let Susy's sweet look fool you...she can and will cause trouble. But she will make you happy while doing it!

she is on etsy! http://www.zombiequeensusan.etsy.com

2009-11-06T18:58:00.000-08:00

Weekend Zombie Doll Sale

This weekend Frogger Zombie is on sale. sha was $20 now she is $15

http://www.zombiequeensusan.etsy.com/

Brains and Bone

2009-11-01T17:20:00.000-08:00

i will not eat my brains with bone
i will not...is your mind gone?

not at the rave
not in my grave

i will not eat my brains with bone
not at all,or on the throne

not in a tomb
not from your womb

i will not eat my brains with bone
not for love or a loan

not with a ghost
and not on toast

i will not eat my brains with bone
not even seasoned with a crone

not in a ditch
or with a witch

i will not, not with pie
even if it's topped with an eye

never will i eat my brains with bone
not with a sigh or with a moan

not from your spleen
and not with the queen

no no no... try you might
leave me be or i will bite!

Twas the Night Before Halloween

2009-10-26T17:02:00.000-07:00

Twas the night before Halloween & while in their grave
The zombie’s were dreaming of brains they crave
Up from the earth the zombies they dug
Up through the dirt and up past the bugs

Out of the ground the zombies poured out
They brushed off the dirt and began stumbling about
Looking for victims they began to prowl
Talking to each other with a moan or a growl

They traveled not far, just up the street
They spotted a crowd, oh good fresh meat

The crowd panicked, they started to run
Chaos ensued, Zombies had much fun
Zombies were shot and people got bit,
Once they started munching the zombies wouldn't quit

Things got bad, things got mean,
Things looked hopeless till in stepped the zombie queen
She tried to undo the damage, she did her best
She saved some people and buried the rest

The zombies she sent them back to their burial plots,
Making them lay in their graves while their flesh rots

Zombies on the Loose

2009-10-26T16:16:00.000-07:00

Hey fellow Zombie owners I need your help. It seems last night some teenagers pranked the Zombie Farm. Did they roll the place? Egg it? No they let loose the defected Zombies that I had yet to return to their graves.

These Zombies are more violent than your average Zombie. It seems that some people on my staff thought it would be funny to raise a few ex-convicts. In case you aren't aware: if a person was evil in life they don't change much when you raise them back up. Except they are a lot harder to get rid of.

Well now they are all on the loose, all except Zombie Joe. He was a stalker in life and now in death he has decided to stalk yours truly, the Zombie Queen. Can't get rid of the cute but irritating undead stalker. (Don't know if he's stalking me it’s because he is attracted to big women or he wants a big meal.)

So please if you see an escaped Zombie, please call ASAP!!! Do not approach them. As to the teens fate for letting them loose. Let's just say the Zombie Queen has cursed them well.
Thanks all, The Zombie Queen

To MyHubbyLeftMe4aSlut, I'm sorry but if you kill them I cannot bring them back and let you kill them again. I’m not saying it's wrong, it just I really don't have the time right now.

Todays Sponsor: Reaper Death Insurance, insurance for the second phase of your existence. You can reach us at ReapingAin'tEasy.fakesite

Zombies and Haunted Houses

2009-10-20T03:45:00.000-07:00

I feel the need to share this with my fellow Zombie owners. Maybe it will keep you from making the same mistake.

DO NOT I repeat DO NOT take your Zombie to a haunted house this weekend. My Zombies begged and pleaded and I finally gave in. So here we go, I pile all of them into my blazer. That was mistake number one: several Zombies in a small enclosed area doea not exactly smell like a garden in springtime. So were waiting in line minding our own business when some smart mouth punk says to Zombie Bob, "hey are you dead or are you that ugly all the time?" Zombie Bob does not do well around people and he tends to over react. So an hour later I'm at the jail bailing out Zombie Bob. I had to pay the teenagers parents a crap load of money. It seems taking a chunk out of the arm of someones smart ass teenager tends to upset the parents.

And my Zombies never even got to go through the haunted house. I ended up renting practically every Zombie movie ever made. We had a all night Zombiethon. Which sounded like a good idea at the time but i regret it now. Now my Zombies get a kick out of going up to visitors to the farm moaning, Brains we want brains. Really not a good selling point. Walking dead jerks have cost me a crap load of money.

Now Zombie Bill wants to go trick or treating. Not happening. One he's too damn old and second he's too damn dead. (One day I will share the story of how Zombie Bill came to be).
Dayna: Sorry you lost your Zombie. Maybe i'll send you a female next time. They don't wonder off as much as the males. (They even pick up after theirselves unlike the males).

A little note to MyZombieAteMyHomework: It's never a good idea to take your Zombie to show and tell. It always ends bad. I can't even count how many best friends i lost to my first Zombie.

Zombies and Halloween

2009-10-19T18:27:00.000-07:00

Todays topic is Zombies and Halloween or more importantly what to do if your Zombie munches on a trick or treater.

We recommend you post a sign such as 'Beware of Zombie' or 'Kids make tasty treats, go away'. If the signs to not deter the little munckins and they make their merry little way to your door please make haste and put the Zombie away. If you fail to get the Zombie put away and he/she/it beats you to the door yell 'STOP' to the Zombie and then yell 'Run like hell' to the kiddies.

Usually it's only the slowest one that gets munched. But usually Zombies just take one bite out of kids then spit it out. For some reasons Zombies can stand the taste of young flesh. I think it's because most kids are rotten.

If parent of munched munkin gets upset please be sure to point out your 'Beware of Zombie' signs then inquire about the kids rabies shots, you don't want your Zombie catching something from the little tykes.

Now with my personal Zombie i have no worries he has been trained to behave around young ones. Actually he loves to play with the kids. BUT REMEMBER MY ZOMBIE IS NOT LIKE YOUR ZOMBIE!! I'm experienced in this Zombie stuff and know how to control mine. After all I am the expert. They don't call me Zombie Queen for nothing. Now if they called me Zombie McMeal then things would be totally different.

Have a safe and happy Halloween!!

Games Zombies Play

2009-10-18T12:27:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the Zombie Farm, where we raise more then hell!!

Hope everyone and their Zombies are doing okay.

Today i'd like to tell you about games Zombies like to play.

My Zombie loves to play Rot Tag, it's like freeze tag but instead of standing frozen when you are tagged you rot. Hey i know it sounds crazy but you know how those Zombies are.
Zombies also love to go to graveyards and play guess my grave or bury the Zombie Queen. I'm not fond of that game but the Zombies get a kick out of it.

We here at the Zombie Farm would like to know the games you play with your Zombie. Or if you have a funny Zombie story please share it with us.

** Women: If you believe that the only good man is a dead man.
Then you're in luck!!!!!
We are having a sale on our male Zombies this month.
Order early!!! The 'large' ones go quick!!!

PS: to AhoyMatey i'm happy that dressing your Zombie as a pirate and playing 'walk my plank' makes you happy but please no more photos of it.

To Hopelessly Devoted 2 U: Congrats on your recent wedding to your Zombie. But i'm sad to say that i looked into your question: but you cannot claim death benefits on your Zombie Husband since he was dead before you married. Sorry but good try.

Need Help on The Zombie Farm

2009-10-14T18:02:00.000-07:00

We need help!!!

Due to events of this weekend some of our staff....became Zombie snacks.

Do i feel guilty about my staff getting munched you ask.

Heck no, they received top of the line training. Besides it doesn't take a genius to know that if a Zombie is coming toward you licking their lips you need to get the hell out of their way! Push the employee next to you in their path. Duh.

Don't worry Zombie customers prices will not go up. I know you're thinking 'oh my imagine the cost of all those funerals'. No need to fear, there wasn't enough left of them for funerals. If there was it still wouldn't effect cost. If i had to bury the staff i'd just raise them back up and put there little butts back to work! I'm an egual opportunity Zombie maker!

If you are interested in a position here at the Zombie Farm please apply. It helps if you have a strong stomach (in case you witness another employee become snack food) and sinus issues (helps block out the smell of rotting flesh). But you must be able to show the Zombies compassion even when they are taking chunks out of your arm or other body part. I just can't have rude little Zombie raisers mouthing off to my Zombies! Really if you were hungry and just wanted a little nibble and someone got pissed at you for taking a little bite of them, imagine how you would feel.

If interested please reply!!!! It's so very hard trying to raise Zombies while taking care of the others. Plus having to go find victims...oops i mean food for the Zombies.

Thank You
Zombie Queen of the Zombie Farm

Zombie Recall

2009-10-11T15:08:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone welcome to the Zombie Farm where we raise much more then hell.

There is an important Zombie recall. But let me address another issue first.

What you do with your Zombie behind closed doors is your business. Please do not send photos. There are some things I just don't want to see. That also refers to video.
(If you send photos after this little announcement you will be responsible for my therapy bills. So if you destroy my mind I destroy your bank account!)

Okay let's get to that recall. Zombies that were raised April of this year seem to have a little defect. It was training month at the farm and it seems one of our new raisers put a wrong ingredient in the zombie raising powder. I'm not going to go into details about what was put in. Just know the result was a batch of Zombies that will suddenly burst out into song. Not just any songs either they seem to enjoy anything by Poison. I'm not knocking the Zombies choice in music I happen to like a little Poison every now and then myself. It's just when a Zombie that has partially decayed vocal cords burst out singing "Talk Dirty To Me", or "I Want Action Tonight" ugh, it's just creepy.

So send the Zombies back for a refund or exchange. Unless of course you like your Zombie bursting into your bedroom late at night jumping into the bed with you while belting out, "I Want Action Tonight." If that makes you happy then of course by all means keep your Zombie, you obviously deserve each other. (Note: If you keep your Zombie please refer to the photo/video issue above. Seriously I don't want to see them.)

Be a responsible Zombie owner: get your Zombie spayed or neutered!

Helpful Zombie Tips

2009-10-11T10:56:00.000-07:00

Hello fellow Zombie owners!
Here are some tips.

1. A well fed Zombie is a happy zombie!

2. A well fed Zombie will not munch its owner.

3. If your Zombie develops bad habits: look at the example you are setting, that is probably the problem!

4. A bored Zombie will run amuck causing havoc in the neighborhood. Give your Zombie plenty of toys. Chew toys make good Zombie toys. (keep brooms out of their reach. A zombie chewed on mine and the damn thing has not flown right since)

5. If your Zombie is upset. Music helps to calm them. A little Rob Zombie is always good. Never ever, can't stress this enough, play The Monster Mash. Zombies hate it and will react violently. This tip from Bub McStub.

Just to let everyone know: We at the Zombie Farm do not raise underage Zombies. To the person who sent that request: Bad Senator! Bad! Bad!

Customers and future customers please see yesterdays blog for important Zombie info.

Crazy on the Zombie Farm

2009-10-10T12:29:00.000-07:00

It's been a wild night here at the Zombie Farm. Several zombies escaped from the corral. Crazy zombies running amuck causing all kinds of havoc. Why are there zombies corralled at the Zombie Farm you ask. Because those crazy customers who return their zombies because they claim, "oh we didn't know they were flesh eating zombies."

Come on people i can't stress this enough. RESEARCH RESEARCH RESEARCH before making a purchase. Owning a zombie is a major commitment. If you aren't willing to 'aquire' a few victims to feed your zombie every month then don't purchase one of our zombies.

Really there is no sadder sight then seeing the hurt and rejection in a zombie's eyes when they are shipped back to us. Please remember Zombies need love too. Even the flesh eating ones! The poor zombies have to be tucked back in their dirt beds but before that they have to be killed. Yet again.

So please people Research Research Research!

Special for October: Buy one zombie raising and get a curse for free!!

Welcome

2009-10-10T12:10:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the Zombie Farm, Zombie Raising Company.

Where we raise the dead for fun and profit. Here we will go into the details of the day to day life on a Zombie Farm. Hope you enjoy!